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What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

12.06.2025 03:54

What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

What factors contributed to The Beatles' bitterness?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

How many of you have had your parental rights taken away because of lies and no truth whatsoever, and did you prove the lies that were told about you to be false either through drug testing or another way, but still had your rights taken?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

TEXT:

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

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Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

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Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

How do you stop your balls from sweating?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why was Nietzsche against essentialism?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

What timeless pieces do you believe every wardrobe should possess?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

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Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

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“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”